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Took My Husband Shopping

March 2nd, 2015 at 07:52 am

My husband's new job might put him in situations where he needs to dress business casual at times, rather than in uniform. Since he rarely dresses that way I wanted to make sure he had something current to wear when the need arises.

My plan was a pair of dress slacks, two shirts and a pair of shoes. I was hoping to spend $100 or less.

It didn't happen. What happened was, he saw my desire to take him shopping as a shopping spree. I did try to explain to him what I thought he needed. In the end I just went with it because honestly it has been years since he had new clothes. I just hope he actually wears this stuff!

He got a sport coat, two shirts, a tie, a pair of shoes, one pair of dress slacks, and a belt from Kohl's for $265! I started joking with him at one point if he needed a tie clip, a new wallet and handkerchiefs too. At least those items were not needed. We did get 15% off and I used my rewards card which netted me a $15 reward.

Guess what? Once he heard I had that reward and $10 off a $25 men's apparel purchase he suddenly needed new jeans. Well he did NEED new jeans...there was a hole in the crotch. I was expecting to buy one pair, but his mind says if one pair is good, I might as well stock up and get two! He and I really do think differently at times. Another $50 spent at Kohl's the next day after the big splurge.

It sounds like I'm complaining, I'm sure. Logically, I know we can afford these purchases and they are needed and should all get used. Emotionally, it was overkill in the amount of things he needed to buy and the outflow of cash right now is just stressing me out! I want it to stop. I think he isn't tuned into the cash flow, so that is something to work on and figure out how to communicate better about.

Have you spent over $300 on clothes recently? What did you get?

16 Responses to “Took My Husband Shopping”

  1. Bob B. Says:

    As a husband who rarely goes shopping, I can identify. He may have been thinking - we're here, let's get this done, so I don't have to do it again anytime soon!

  2. creditcardfree Says:

    Bob, I'm sure you are right!! Thanks for that perspective. I just didn't like that our thoughts about the whole trip didn't exactly align. Smile

  3. JulieAlbright Says:

    Oh don't even get me started on husbands and clothes. Our situation is that my husband needs an Executive wardrobe for work so it gets expensive. I made the mistake one time though of pointing out he spends about 5 times what the rest of the family was spending combined on clothes. Which is actually reasonable since I mostly work from home in jeans and tennis shoes and the kids and I are actually okay dressing from Target and Kohls. But apparently I managed to insult his manhood during that conversation.

    Our (my) problem is this. He can spend what he needs to spend, or even wants to spend, that's fine. He works really hard and he earns a lot of money and if he thinks he needs a thousand dollar suit then he probably needs a thousand dollar suit.

    But since I'm the one who has to balance the budget, it has me seeing red when he just all the sudden spends $900 or so on one weekend of internet shopping with no advance warning so I can plan for it and then I have to go to the Emergency Fund savings account to buy .... clothes. Uugh. I can feel myself getting tense and the blood pressure rising just thinking about it. And then he doesn't believe he spent $900 and I have to add up all the receipts to prove it.

    I finally used YNAB and figured out what he spent over one year and I try to build up a reserve. But we still get into it every once and awhile we he glances at the budget and sees that number accumulating and says "No Way I Spend That Much!!!!"

    Uh yes, you do. We actually hardly ever fight about money but this has always been a sore spot for us. Well that and the amount of closet space his work wardrobe commands.

  4. Frugal in France Says:

    I will never again spend 300 dollars or Euros for clothes and it doesn't bother me for the moment but maybe when the ones I have get a bit tired, I'll feel like your husband and want to splurge, though I know I won't. I agree with Bob's comment : men usually don't like going into shops but when they're there, they like to do the job efficiently !

  5. CB in the City Says:

    Wardrobes are very personal. I know I wouldn't like to feel restricted or directed in my clothing choices. That said, I understand the need to hold the budget line, too. It's just a little tricky when the family budget manager is not the buyer!

  6. Another Reader Says:

    If he needs to dress that way and shopped at Kohls instead of Nordstrom, I think he did very well. You may not have been expecting to spend that much, but from the outside it looks like he got what he needed at a reasonable price. Most men hate to shop and I think Bob B. is right. They just want to get what they need and be done with it.

  7. creditcardfree Says:

    CB, your right it is tricky when the buyer isn't the financial manager, but is the wage earner. I really just had to bite my tongue. I think I will start looking for a good deal on shorts and summer footwear as I see those being next on his list of needs...although not for work!!

  8. My English Castle Says:

    This is my husband exactly. He would happily go without new clothes for years, but once he starts, he buys so much! I bought him a Men's Warehouse gift card a couple years ago which was gathering dust, but one weekend when I was out of town, he spent all $200 of that, plus another $150 more. I left some Kohl's cash when I went to the UK, and he spent that and another $25. I tend to buy one thing here, and then another a few weeks later or even months, but he buys a lot very infrequently.

  9. snafu Says:

    1st, didn't you suggest DH needed business casual garb? Logically you can afford the purchases and you also acknowledged they were needed so I can't see why you're distressed. I've a 'clothes horse' DH so I found your outline of purchases oh so modest. How much have you spent on DH's wardrobe in the past 12 months? According to the research, 4% of earned income is about average.

  10. creditcardfree Says:

    @snafu, I'm distressed because there has been quite a bit of cash outflow in recent months. It is just wearing on me. I'm a better saver than a spender. Smile

  11. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    I went shoe shopping yesterday. After a frustrating visit to three stores finally found a pair that worked - $31. More than I normally spend on shoes, but I had to get something to replace my worn out work shoes, and these worked.

    I can understand why you were feeling stressed about the money - I was feeling annoyed at spending so much on shoes myself.

  12. VS_ozgirl Says:

    Creditcardfree my husband is the same! He hates shops so if we have to buy him clothes it is not cheap stuff and not just one thing. I do find that giving clothes items as presents reduces the need for spendy shopping trips though. Not as the main present but an additional present here and there. (Which is my tip for handling the situation )

  13. creditcardfree Says:

    VS_ozgirl, yes I need to do better about buying things for him as gifts. If I can find them on clearance, even better!

  14. scottish girl Says:

    Maybe he just wanted to get them while you were there to help? When he's in the new state you won't be there to help him choose.

  15. Firstofmanysteps Says:

    I realize the unexpected spending is stressing, but I can't help being amused at seeing complains about men overspending on clothing.

  16. creditcardfree Says:

    @first, I understand. It is more amusing to me as time has passed, too!

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